The joy from not understanding
Untitled by Asmus Jacob Carstens, 1789, (cropped)
People open books for various reasons. One seeks romance, another seeks thriller or something completely different. While there is no better reason than another, for me books were somehow always about new knowledge - ideally in a form that was initially partly unclear to me.
It was a rainy day during the summer holidays in thermal spa. Just perfect opportunity to combine relax with a book. After the hot water, I went to a deck chair.
While not exclusively, I was into psychoanalysis at that time. So I took Introductory Lectures on Psycho-Analysis by Sigmund Freud and started reading. I am sure there were many other books that would have helped me understand more quickly than transcripts of lectures from 1915 to 1917.
But for me, books are not about quick understanding. Quite the contrary, I like being put in a state where I don't understand. Non-understanding is the beginning of understanding.
After repeated reading and thinking, there is the moment, when everything finally clicks together and the text that was just a moment ago unclear is clear.
I call this moment a mental orgasm. It's pure joy, the joy of understanding, the joy of expanding knowledge. Which then allows one to interpret world around in a different way.
I never reached such joy through overly simplified or summarized texts, and certainly not through generative AI responses.
After all, how could something I understood even before I saw it touch my soul?
I am new here and I would be happy if you join me on my new writing journey.